Solutions for dejected DADT Republican homophobes

By tmcbpatriot | December 19, 2010 | 3 Comments

Republicans. I feel your pain. Something happened today that goes against everything you believe in. Today “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” (DADT) was repealed. And just like that we are now allowing gays to fight along side…gulp…blacks…and…gasp…whites. What’s next? Will dogs soon be able to join the army?

I know what you are thinking too. This is going to suck because it is so hard to tell a gay guy from a regular guy. I mean, they look just like you and me. Some are even black, which will now make liking those people twice as hard. Thanks alot Democrats! Why do you hate Republicans so much? Why are you trying to make life in the military miserable?

All this repeal will accomplish will be to make gays feel obligated to join the military. We saw this happen with blacks too. It will be as if they owe the United States something as a way of saying ‘thanks’ to the White House. If you recall, blacks were doing just fine before Harry Truman decided to integrate the military through executive order. Can you imagine the balls on that guy? He didn’t even bother to ask anyone if it was OK. He didn’t wait months for military reports and studies. He didn’t poll Americans or military personnel. He just decided to de-segregate the military because….get this….because he thought it was the right thing to do. What an elitist!

Now, I feel for you Tony Perkins, President of the Family Research Council who said this in today’s Washington Post:

“Today is a tragic day for our armed forces. The American military exists for only one purpose – to fight and win wars. Yet it has now been hijacked and turned into a tool for imposing on the country a radical social agenda. This may advance the cause of reshaping social attitudes regarding human sexuality, but it will only do harm to the military’s ability to fulfill its mission.

“It is clear why this was done: not to enhance the military’s ability to accomplish its mission or to enhance national security. Rather, it is a political payoff to a tiny, but loud and wealthy, part of the Democratic base.

And John McCain. I know how angry and sad you can get at times like this:

“I hope that when we pass this legislation that we will understand that we are doing great damage.” “Today is a very sad day.”

President McCain….ooops sorry….I mean Senator McCain, you fought so hard to make sure those generals “on the ground” as you like to say, were in agreement with this decision. Who cares if almost every one of them, including the Pentagon, and military servicemen and servicewomen were? What about those guys who weren’t? You even went so far as to produce a letter signed by “over a thousand retired and flag general officers.” So what if most were too old to have served during the time when DADT was in place? Are we just going to ignore our fellow veterans in times like this? Anyone? Bueller?

You know, I read all of this negativity coming from Republicans and I have to say, with all their straight laced white-bred closed mindedness they really don’t get it. What they are seeing as the end of the world is really a blessing in disguise. Perhaps if they just used their homophobic creativity they could see a much more optimistic outcome.

For example, here are some creative suggestions that I hope Republicans like John McCain and others will consider:

The All-Gay Regiments – Guys, you have to think outside the box here. DADT is not about de-segregation. It is simply about allowing gays to be gay without fear of losing their job. There is nothing in there about keeping them segregated. Go for it!
The Gay-Border Patrol – Forget building a wall on the border of Mexico. That is so 1961. Just send all the gays to the border and have them sit out their military contracts in the hot sun. If we have to have gays in the military what better place for them than out in the desert? Plus, they love to tan so it’s a win-win for everyone.
Mine Sweepers – Send all the gays out on mine sweeping patrols. Who better to get blown up than the gay guy right? Plus, they explode much more fabulously than normal soldiers.
Gay Tattoos – Give the gay soldiers tattoos like the germans did to the jews in WWII. It is a great way to identify them quickly after they have been shot defending their country and their fellow soldiers. And if they are killed….hope hope….it will also enable to military to send them home in rainbow colored caskets instead of the American flag ones. They would be hilarious and also remind everyone that gays are in the military.

Now, I am sure Republicans are aware that gays have always been in the military for as long as there has been a military. This is nothing new. The problem is that now we have to allow for pretty curtains in the barracks and pink jeeps on the roads — and we all know those will be like moving targets. It is also going to be much harder to expect the guy in the foxhole to be able to run in high heels.

Bottom line is that once again the Democrats are having their way like spoiled children. As a result, Republicans once again have to suffer. Having blacks desegregated in the armed forces was bad enough. Now, with gays prancing around the front lines it is going to make the soldiers job harder and even downright embarrassing.

I mean seriously, how is a normal soldier going to live a quality life having to explain to his family and friends that he is alive today because some gay man, a man who probably spent years willingly training so that he could fight alongside him, actually died saving his life?

I mean…jeez. How embarrassing is that? Thanks Democrats. Thanks for nothing.

Comments

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Jessierae7

I’m guessing that you classify yourself as a christian and its ironic how more than likely you’ll preach your beliefs until the day you die part of which is loving thy neighbor so what is the difference between you treating gays differently, disreguarding them as people and being a homosexual? According to the Bible both are sins and the Bible says we will be forgiven for our sins. So next time before you open your mouth why don’t you worry about yourself and focus on being a better person than focus on what other people do.

Anonymous

Hello and thanks for the post. I am not quite sure you read it though. I am no Christian, believe me. Religion is for fools. It’s a fairy tale. You believe global warming, which can be proven is fake, but an Ark and God creating the universe in a week, thats fact. Please! Read the post next time before you decide to vomit out your mouth.